tick tick tick, like a clock, like a time bomb ready to go nonstop.

Its funny. When Im waiting for something to come, I zone in on all things related to time, but particularily the ticks and chimes of a clock. It seems to be saying "its close its close its close" and the chime seems to be going "its COMING"

Tommorrow is something Ive waited for a really long time. Its my Sweeney Todd audition. Im so excited, and so totally amped. This is the first show(besides RENT) that I thought "I have to be a part of this" Thats for a couple reasons. 1) The music is amazing and weird and I love weird. 2)Maybe just maybe, this will bring me some satisfaction as a performer and I can stop chasing tails of ghosts that could have happened. Sweeney has alot to do with my want for professional theatre, maybe if I do a non equity version of it, my hankering for stage time will go away. I doubt it, but at least I wont be able to say I didnt try.

Thats been the basis of my existance really, because all I can do is try. Its seldom that things work out the way I want them to, but when they do, its one of the most amazing, most gratifying things Ive ever known.

So the clock ticks away, seconds, ticks away from tommorrow. Its pushing on my nerves.
I feel like captain hook in peter pan. I always laughed at his frightened stupor over clocks.

Now I understand



Forgetting isnt easy, giving up when youre forced to give in is harder. Im trying, slowly but surely, I will let theatre go